Top 22 Mo Rocca Quotes

Hypocrisy is great fodder for comedy.

It’s much easier to make jokes about sensitive issues if there is some dissent, some conflict.

I think that Obama is very cool. And I think he‘s clever, and I think he can be witty. But I don’t think he’s funny in either the way that Reagan was funny – or John McCain and Dick Cheney are both funny in that ruthless, kind of mean way.

Yes, I still love ‘South Park,’ but I also love morning TV now.

I’d rather call myself a mischief-maker, an imp, rather than a satirist. Satirist sounds so self important. Plus no one is calling himself an imp right now. It makes me feel special.

It’s one of my favorite things to do, watch TV and stretch. I’m so flexible. I can put my legs behind my head. I want to be the most flexible person in the world.

I can’t be everything to everyone. Send me your specs.

I know a lot about a few things – mostly useless things.

I have a Keurig coffee maker, which is really kind of a luxury. It was given to me by an ex. I realized when I’m feeling sentimental, I’ll gently, tenderly press the button. Then when I remember he dumped me, I punch it.

Think of all that hard work our founding fathers put in – the revolutionizing, the three-fifths compromising, having to write the entire Constitution with a quill – and yet they neglected to include the right to vote.

The most important thing is to write material that YOU think is funny. If you don’t think it’s funny, but you’re convinced that other people will think it is, well they won‘t.

No, no, no separate but equal… never the twain shall meet. And the pendulum kept swinging and it came to rest in the bastard hybrid known as the Daily Show.

Look, not embracing the ‘Today‘ show is soooo yesterday.

Something that came as a shock to me is that we do not have a constitutional right to vote. And that’s not just a fun little historical factoid. It actually has huge ramifications. It’s the reason our system is so decentralized – in other words, chaotic.

One Christmas my father kept our tree up till March. He hated to see it go. I loved that.

My sophomore year I spent exactly one day on the JV football team. It was the tryout day.

Christmas is a stocking stuffed with sugary goodness.

I am a kamikaze gadfly.

I was way too hyperactive to study for long. I would freak out, then crash, then be too tired to read or write. I really should have had less sugar.

Did I end up finding a little blue pill to cure America‘s electoral dysfunction? Unfortunately, it’s not that simple.

If there’s one thing that everyone can agree on, it’s that, right or wrong, they hate the press.

Homemade sweaters are always itchy.